Learn to become grounded

A few days after writing my last blog, I received a monthly news letter from a Dr Dave Moseman, who lives in Minneapolis, he was diagnosed with a type of eye disease and can no longer practice, ...I enjoy his newsletters.  Anyway, after reading the latest one, 4 words really stood out for me, practically knocking me off my chair.   LEARN TO BECOME GROUNDED.

I want to share some excerpts with you...and highlighted words that really shout out to my inner being...

When we find ourselves stopped by a disability we become lost in the Wilderness. Yet we need to calm down and become aware of our surroundings.  Our surroundings nurturer us constantly, but in our busy lives it gets overshadowed.

While we are mourning for what we have lost, our dreams, our self-image, our identity, we need to be loved. Our impulse is to crawl into our shells and hide. Pulling back and taking a pause in our busy life plans is necessary, we also need to get in touch with what is our true essence.

There is a voice with us always. In our busy lives we rush to and fro and only listen to that voice that says do this and that. When we can no longer do this and that, we have the opportunity to listen to the quieter voices in our lives, the ones that come from our core.  Become silent and listen to Gods Spirit, His Voice speaking to our soul.

As we listen for the quiet core messages we find other things too. We discover that we are not alone. We feel things, too.
We find the caresses that abound. Those soothing caresses come in the gentle sound of rain, or wind in the trees. They come from the concerns of friends and family. Suddenly we find we are loved not for what we can do, but for ourselves.
If we relax and open up, we can feel the sun. If we but open our eyes we can see what is around us. The splendor of a cold winter’s day, the shimmering green or summer leaves. Life goes on in its rhythm of contraction and renewal.
With the onset of disability, we have entered a time of contraction. Like the World in winter we must hibernate and prepare for the renewal to follow.  In the winter snow we see tracks of animals scurrying about. Few are around to be seen.
Most animals birth their young in the spring. So too, we will be reborn when our spring comes.

When I entered my Winter of Disability, I got in touch with Spiritual things I had put aside for my career. I read and studied the book of Job. I read Herbert Kurshner’s book “On why Bad things happen to Good People”.
For me the message of Job was to let go and let God hear my pains, to let God respond to my pains. In those moments of surrender I felt caressed and not alone, I found opportunity and freedom.
When you find yourself stopped by disability, use it as an opportunity to return to your core, Pray, Journal, meditate. Become grounded in what you have walked away from in your formerly busy life.  Find who you have really been, consult family and friends, about who they think you are.  Start a new Chapter in your life

I ask you to reflect on these questions.

• When have you needed to pause and reflect?
• How have you been able to get back in touch with yourself?
• Share your brokenness with those you love and trust.

May you too be touched by these thoughts of Dr Moseman, if you know of someone needing encouragement in the disability they are facing...please share this.

Be blessed

Ways to a positive Wellbeing

Its been just over a year that I have been home since breaking my leg and then diagnosed with Essential Tremors;
It has been just over a year that I have had to make sense of a lot of emotional, physical and spiritual issues in my life;
It has been just over a year now that I have had to reflect and learn that,  in order to survive within myself, daily, I would have to focus on my well being. 

  

What is important to realise, when we give from within, enjoy doing, embrace new or exciting experiences, motivate and encourage others and importantly appreciate the smallest things in life...like hearing the birds tweeting as dawn breaks (and yes you still awake and haven't slept a wink)...that life is great.

Daily we need to realise that,  even though God directs the path we travel, we as humans are also the masters and mistresses of our lives...in other words, we can huddle in a corner and play the pity party game or we can wake up each day and enjoy the beauty and wonder that each day brings.

Grasp each moment with the wonder that only life can bring.

Be blessed....

The Power of a Smile

Think about this for a moment.  How important is a smile to you?  How does it make you feel, to smile, to be smiled at?   For me, a smile can turn the day around. The Power of a Smile can instantly transform a frown or bring sunshine to a gray day. Yet how often do we take "the opportunity to smile" for granted?  Again, for me, I know I do.

When I was still working, I had a pic of a jester printed and stuck on the wall that said SMILE.  As you entered my office that was the first thing one saw, and no matter how down, stressed, frustrated or anxious a university student was, when they left my office they always left smiling, and, they quickly learnt never to enter the office without a smile.  I recently received an email from a graduate student, saying how she misses being encouraged with a smile, that this became the one thing she looked forward to when returning to student residence, know her spirits will be lifted.  

Sharing this with you has me smiling with memories, it makes one feel that nothing was in vain, that someone's heart was reached.

How often now, as we find ourselves in some or other frustrating health or physically challenging situation, do we smile....even randomly?  Are we so focussed on our own issues that we cant just smile at a stranger, at something funny and let the Power of our Smile affect those we come in contact with.

I challenge you today, next time you feel downhearted, frustrated or challenged by your health situation...dig out those pictures that make you smile, think back to moments that made you laugh and smile....as you walk about in a shopping mall, make eye contact with someone really looking down and SMILE....just smile for the sake of smiling...you will love how it makes you feel, and you will smile more when you see the reaction on peoples' faces.

A smile is a powerful tool, you can even break ice with it

Why is a smile important to you?

Focusing on your well being

So,...... I thought I would share some ideas that make caring for yourself a manageable reality.

While there is no magic cure to relieve some of the realities of what we face with our various disabilities, taking time for ourself helps. A good place to start is for couples to talk with each other about their self care needs and then co-create nourishing and re-energizing opportunities for them as individuals and as a couple, or to chat to a friend or family member.   Its not a pity party by no means, and its also important for the person listening to know that.
For both, self care, whether spiritually, physically or emotionally can seem elusive or inconceivable and for some, even unacceptable, however, its very important to focus on our well being....this is what drives one, it sure drives me even when I feel I am in an emotional doldrum or if its a bad day health wise.

It is so important that we are reminded that in any type of relationship, i.e. with yourself, your partner, friend, family member(s), we find the "us" in maintaining any form of relationship.

• Let go of the notion you have to do it all by yourself.
• Identify what is extraneous and depletes your energy.
• Practice saying "no" on occasion.
• Practice saying "i need your help".
• Learn to share responsibilities with your spouse/family/friend, if you can, know matter how small.
• Overcome being intimidated by others who seem to do this effortlessly.
• Find a Life Coach who work respectfully with you.
• Broaden your skills to better handle stressful behaviors or circumstances.
• Find environments that fit your needs (e.g. don't go to supermarkets when its busy, avoid peak hour traffic if it creates tension).
• Network with people who have similar situation/disabilities you are in or are just starting to face, to learn what lies ahead and discover their coping strategies and techniques.

Meeting your own needs can come in a variety of forms, depending on what would be fulfilling at a given time. Perhaps your internal batteries can be recharged with quiet reflection and other times rejuvenated by having contact with people whom you feel close and understood.  I know, that just enjoying the view of the sea or being in a scenic nature environment helps me to focus on my well being 

Ideas to consider for revitalization are:
Develop a relationship with someone you can trust; 
Block out non-negotiable time for you and your spouse on your calendar.
Go out on dates with your spouse, friend, family — something interesting, novel and fun.
Find a form of exercise you like to do; designate time, even if for short periods — it will be invigorating.
Meditate, learn relaxation techniques.
Listen to uplifting music.
Get involved in something you thought you would never do and things you like to do. It builds up your reserves.
Start or join a book club, support or discussion group.
Attend the theatre, lectures, movies, music and/or sporting events.
Get good rest, including power naps.
Keep a private journal to pour out your dark thoughts and negative feelings.
Create a space for a safe haven in your home; make it your special retreat.

Its important to realise that challenging your attitude about self care and not abandoning your needs, will allow you to gain new perspectives about renewal and energy. 
Often, by making yourself do some of these things, you'll discover you cope more effectively, minimizing the risk of burnout (physically or emotionally). You deserve to claim time and space for yourself. In being creative, your possibilities are endless.

I want to end off by saying, all the above is good and very important, but the most important aspect when focusing on your well being, is LAUGHTER, a jolly good dosage of this and to be added as part of your Chronic Medication.

“Laughter is wine for the soul - laughter soft, or loud and deep, tinged through with seriousness - the hilarious declaration made by man that life is worth living.”
― Seán O'Casey

Time for my cuppa ...greetings to you